Tell the world

Man where do I begin. Coming home from the men's retreat a couple weeks ago I was worried my life would return to where I left it. I so did not want to go back to that.

What I came back to changed my world. I came back to find out that I am going to be a dad! I know, its pretty stinkin' exciting. I go back and forth between the emotions of excitement and freaked-outness. Its mind boggling to think that we are going to be parents. At times it seems like we are pulling the biggest prank, like in a week we will have to go back to everyone and say "hey, we were just kidding". Even the night I found out I was sure I was dreaming, that at any moment I would wake up and it would all be a dream. The reality of it is slowly begining to set in.

I have had fun the past week, shocking the world one person at a time. Most of the reactions were like mine and included: Shut Up! Shut up! Are you serious. Does Natasha know? No way. Ahhhhh! Are you kidding? When I finally figured out what I was sent to see in the bathroom (I thought we had a plumbing problem and kept looking for the "problem" for like 5 minutes before I found what I was supposed to find) I sat there saying Shut Up over and over and over. Then the tears of joy pretty much started flowing. Because you have no idea what we have gone through as a couple to get to this point. If you would have asked me three years ago if I had to guess what the future held for our marriage and my choices were kid or divorce I would have had a hard time choosing kid. So when I look back at the past three years and think about how our lives have changed...I don't know what to say...freaking amazing.

Speaking of amazing. Here is what I will be google-ing tonight. How in the world does the heart beat for the first time? I can't comprehend it...cells dividing, organs developing, body forming, and then at some point that heart beats for the first time.

This is crazy, I am going to be a dad! I want to go to one of those New Zealand mountain tops and scream it from the top of my lungs.